...i checked my safe deposit box.............no canary yellow third page copy.....you know the one....upper left hand corner it sez KEEP THIS COPY FOR YOUR RECORDS.....on the bottom (in bright red) DON'T LOSE THIS DUMMY!!!!!...below my signature....not the funny phony signature reserved for managements safety meetings, time capsules and petitons you neither support or oppose but you're still on the fence about....but the real deal....and if you think you have the top original copy you better get the fat bald pawnbroker from the history channel to check it out....not chumly either......
I DID'NT SIGN UP FOR MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS
....it chose me.....and not llke that girl you did'nt know that asked you to the sadie hawkins dance and the football coach said if you did'nt go with her you could'nt play friday night....and it was'nt a leapyear....sadie hawkins is only supposed to happen on leap year....trust me i know...but that was just one dance;;;i was tired from the dance...and she was pretty nice.....tall enough to dance with.....lol.....but M.S. is'nt like that..........it and other chronic, incurable , autoimmune diseases.....well they pick you.....and folks with M.S. are like snowflakes similar but different....so we just don't know...life is one big crackerjack box......and the prize is when you wake up in the morning and begin the sisyphus like boulderpushung uphill trudge through the day .....always wary .....will my legs or hands stop working after lunch...will those black spots in my eyes i hafta kinda peek around come back????????
.....right now i'm healing....i won't go into details and (trust me) you don't want to read them...but i'm healing....years back i attended opening night of author robert fulgham and the mill mountain players...acting out stories from his books....you may have read EVERYTHING I KNOW I LEARNED IN KINDERGARTEN .......i remember him saying most folks don't know the difference between a problam and an inconvienience.....the last time i was in the mri tube (trust me i have frequent flyer miles in those badboys) i did'nt realize......i was stage zillion infection....and as bad as it was....several days later i was told i was within hours of death when i got myself transported out of state to a facility that could and would help me.....i read psalms and the sermon on themount often......i've been asked what my life verse is......and i think LIKE THOSE TATER CHIPS MAN I GOTTA HAVE MORE THAN ONE ............
....plenty of time to try to remember several chapters of matthew while in the mri tube or waitin' for someone to answer the call button whilst i lay here............i never signed up for it but i've got spare time abundent now to pay for it....i'm determined i will walk (or stand and wobble short distances with assistance) again....first i must be patient with the person on the other end of the call button...and get strong enough to slide myself into my wheelchair.....
....i have lots of time.....maybe God was tellin' me to slow down a bit.......maybe mr. fulgham is right and this is merely an a inconvienience....lol..and probly so are most of the things i hear folk complainin' 'bout......i know of people in far worse shape than most who treat it like a speed bump....how many have ever truly stared a real problem in the face??? that young man with muscular dystrophy in his wheelchair at the reno nevada airshow last weekend.....and the pilot of the speeding plane at the moment he identifed the "BIG OOPS" and the p-51 hit the wheelchair....they stared into the bloodshot eyes of a real problem......
i woke up today...my head hurt....my feet stank....my back ached.....maybe a few speedbumps but so far no real problems today....after 182 bags of intraveneous antibiotic i'm not as close to death now.....God ain't finished with me yet.....and i'm not done with me either.....there's a quessadilla with my name on it .....and music to play.......i'm trying real hard to look at all this as a gravel in my shoe...and consider those birds of the field....Gods been taking good care of me too....maybe i did'nt sign up for multiple sclerosis.....but if dealing with it is part of my faith in God then i say bring it on because only he can get me up and teetering around on a cane (a cane i've already ordered....maple stained to match my mandolin...) and i WILL stand again............to be contiued.....
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